


as blood was smeared on his phone screen

by Winterhunter_world



Category: Persona 4
Genre: Blood, Blood Loss, I'm sorry Yu, M/M, Self-Harm, Suicide Attempt, i project my weird mood on yu, kind of a songfic but its not a focus i just have lyrics in there, kind of ends abruptly but he's fine dont worry, this is my first time writing these boys so i hope i didnt mess them up, this is not a light fic, yosuke is also not having a great time, yu is having a bad time
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-05
Updated: 2021-03-05
Packaged: 2021-03-18 01:23:05
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,443
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29850453
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Winterhunter_world/pseuds/Winterhunter_world
Summary: Yu couldn’t bear it anymore. It was too much. He was being crushed. He was suffocating. Drowning in his own head.
Relationships: Dojima Ryotaro & Narukami Yu, Hanamura Yosuke/Narukami Yu, Hanamura Yosuke/Persona 4 Protagonist, Hanamura Yosuke/Seta Souji
Comments: 3
Kudos: 26





	as blood was smeared on his phone screen

**Author's Note:**

> So yeah I wrote this in like two hours and kind of disregarded how canon goes because I didn't want to do research. This is pretty a pretty heavy fic so be careful. Also yes i'm fine just been in a weird mood and i've been having some pretty morbid thoughts that I ended up projecting onto my favourite boy. I know that this is tagged hurt/comfort but there isn't that much comfort. The song lyrics are from cairo by Sam Fermin.
> 
> Irl friends that I know follow this account, fuck off <3

Yu couldn’t bear it anymore. It was too much. He was being crushed. He was suffocating. Drowning in his own head. 

The world was falling in and out of focus. The cold floor of the bathroom was seeping into his bones. His wrists were throbbing with fresh hot pain. And yet, all he could feel was relief. The pain distracted him from the slippery slope that were his thoughts. If he let himself think, everything would go back to Nanako, Dojima, both in the hospital. He hadn’t been able to save them.  
Yu was growing dizzy. The blood loss had caught up to him. He smiled deliriously, silver hair falling into his eyes. With a shaking hand, he grabbed the phone sat on the toilet bowl. He brought it up to his face, wiping the blood smeared on it off to see the screen clearly.  
He turned up his phone’s volume and clicked through his music app to a playlist he had made for the occasion. Yosuke had introduced him to the songs a while ago. It had been a peaceful day as they had cuddled in Yu’s futon, Yosuke adding song after song to his empty music app. As the rhythmic sound of a drum filled the bathroom he tapped out of the music app.  
The cello’s melody soothed his feverish mind as he clicked onto the chat app, clicking through a few pages until he reached the group chat named investigation lads. He closed his eyes tightly, this was it.

~You restless son. You ribbon winner. Did everything so they could see~

Yu opened his eyes, there was no turning back after this. He tried to wipe more blood off the screen. The group chat was busy. His team was hotly debating if they had made the right choice about Namatame.  
Yu hesitated. He didn’t want to bring them all down due to his stupid issues. Oh well. He had nothing else to lose. Not after Nanako.

~Cairo. Come back home. Twenty-eight days of delirium. Three is a crowd and two is in love. But I can't sleep alone~

He typed out a message.  
I’m sorry. I can’t bear it anymore. Goodbye.  
Nearly dropping his phone on his face, he pressed send. Worried messages flooded the chat. His friends desperately asking him to answer them. He smiled sadly. He wasn’t going to be bothering them for long.  
Yu clicked out of the chat. Watching notification banners grace the top of his phone screen. A call came through from Yosuke. The contact name simply read partner <3 as opposed to the rest of his friends who all had their full names as their contact names. He declined the call. Frantic text messages flooded in from Yosuke, all begging him to call back, to say something. The last one to come in only said.  
im cming ovr prtnr dnt do anytng 

He only had a few minutes before Yosuke came barging in, at least the bathroom door was locked, it should keep his partner out for long enough. Yosuke had a house key so he would be able to go straight up to him.

Was there anything left? Oh yeah. Dojima. He owed him at least an apology for taking the coward’s way out. The cello and drums picked up in speed. The two singers’ voices filled the bathroom.  
Yu clicked back to his home screen and into his text app.  
I am so sorry for this uncle, but I cannot keep going on. I am sorry to abandon you at a time like this.  
He pressed send. All his goodbyes were sent. It was time to accelerate the proceedings before Yosuke made it to the house. He tossed his phone away, he wouldn’t need it anymore.

~No steady stream of human life.  
Now you're leeching blood. You red-mouthed sinner. Chasing anything into the night~

Yu sat up with a groan, his body stiff from how long he had been laying on the floor. He grabbed the old knife that Yosuke had used in battle a while back before upgrading to something better. Yu had kept the knife despite reason.  
He took a deep breath. He stood up on shaky legs and sat down into the warm bath, the water soaking his shirt and boxers. He pressed the knife to his thighs with a trembling hand.

~Can't get by and I can't let go. And I can't sleep alone. Cairo… Cairo… Cairo… Cairo...~

The cello reached a crescendo.  
The world faded out. 

Panicked yells and thumps against the bathroom door stirred Yu back into reluctant consciousness. Why wasn’t he dead yet?  
“Go away,” he said, his voice hoarse. “Just let me go.”  
The door banged open. Yosuke barged in, wearing only one of his v-necks and a pair of sweats, he didn’t even have shoes on. He darted over to Yu’s side, taking in the bloody water he was resting in and the blood-splattered state the bathroom was in. He was shaking, Yu idly noticed.  
“No, no, no, no,” he said lowly, panicked. “Partner…”  
His boyfriend reached into the bath, hauling him out of the water despite Yu’s weak protests. Yosuke struggled to get Yu over the edge, his larger frame proving hard to leverage. With a grunt, Yosuke got him over, Yu half landing on the floor, dragging Yosuke down with him. Yosuke quickly recovered, kneeling at Yu’s side, his arms wrapped around him in a shaky embrace.  
“Let me go,” Yu’s weak voice broke the silence. “I can’t do this anymore, just let me go.”  
Yosuke shook his head with vigour, “No! I’m not letting you do this!” Yosuke’s phone started ringing in his back pocket. “Shit!” he cursed, one arm letting go of Yu’s slumped and still bleeding form to grab at his phone. He struggled for a few seconds before managing to pull it from his pants.  
“Naoto!” he said as soon as the call connected, “I got to him, but he’s seriously bleeding out! What do I do! There’s blood everywhere!”  
Yu couldn’t hear Naoto’s answer, the detective’s voice too muffled for him to make out any words. Yosuke nodded frantically at what they said.  
“Thank you, okay, got that. How much time until the ambulance gets here?” he asked to Yu’s mounting dread. They weren’t going to let him die, he wasn’t going to be free. His body started shaking at the thought. Yosuke noticed, putting his phone down with a quick explanation to Naoto.  
“It’s okay partner. You’re gonna be okay.”  
“Yosuke, I- I can’t do this anymore. Nanako’s gone. I failed!” Yu cried out the last few words, grief taking control. “I failed everyone.”  
Yosuke found the gauze under the sink and started tightly wrapping Yu’s wrist. Naoto spoke up from Yosuke’s phone, apparently having been put on speaker at some point.  
“Senpai... Dojima-san called me when he got your text and couldn’t reach you, Nanako woke up, she is going to be fine. The ambulance is going to be there soon senpai, we are not letting you do this to yourself.”  
Yu grasped Yosuke’s shirt in a death grip, a silent question conveyed between the two of them. His boyfriend nodded, concentrated on trying to stop Yu’s blood from escaping his body. Yu let out a shaky exhale. The world was swaying again.  
Everything went dark.

Yu woke up to familiar fingers threading through his wet hair and the sound of voices. He blinked a few times, disoriented. A gasp rang out, making him wince and bury his head in the crook of Yosuke’s neck. The voices came into focus. One of them was Yosuke, the other Naoto and the last one was… Chie?  
The world went dark again.

The sound of sirens roused him from unconsciousness. Yosuke’s fingers were still threading through his hair. There were more voices now. Yu groaned in pain at the noise and the throbbing hot pain slashes on his wrists and thighs. There were more hands on him now, they weren’t Yosuke’s. He whimpered.  
“Shhh partner, it’s okay,” Yosuke murmured against Yu’s hair.  
The world faded away.

After that, Yu only remembered vague flashes. Hands hoisting him up and out of the house, a siren, too many voices, and bright lights.

He woke up in a bed. Someone was holding his hand. He blinked a few times, wincing at the bright lights.  
“Partner?”  
That was Yosuke’s voice. Yu laboriously turned his head to the side, his body fighting him the whole time. Yosuke’s pale and tired face came into view, soon split by a relieved smile.  
“Yosuke… I’m so sorry. I- I love you.”  
“Love you too partner.”


End file.
